A Clock Dodgers Weekly Feature Article
NFL Split 10
(Top 5 – Bottom 5)
Week 6 – 2016
Written By: Eddie Cepeda (@eddiecee23)
Minnesota Vikings 5-0What can we say about them that hasn’t been said? Go to any team in the league, take their starting quarterback and Hall of Fame running back away. That should spell disaster right? Apparently that spells 5-0 and final undefeated team for the the Vikings. After a dominant win that now has Texans management wishing they had written a refund clause in Brock Osweiler’s contract, the Vikings are the undisputed number one team in the league.
Pittsburgh Steelers 4-1After what seems to be just a stumble on the road of contention, the Steelers have rebounded with two dominant wins. The addition of Le’Veon Bell has this Pittsburgh offense running at full capacity. Now, the league has to be noticing the emergence of their defense. While it won’t dominate in yards or points allowed per game. They put their offense in good situations to have solid, time consuming drives.
New England Patriots 4-1We are all witnesses! Wait… no, that’s Cleveland’s thing. Whatever, he’s back! As we all predicted, the revenge tour has begun. Brady and the Patriots will look to hoist the Lombardi trophy this year as a symbolic, obscene gesture in the direction of commissioner Goodell. Look for them to run the score up and be surprisingly violent in an already violent sport. The league has been warned, the Patriots are coming
Atlanta Falcons 4-1Here’s another one of those surprise turnarounds. After dropping a game to the Buccaneers in week one, Atlanta has been on roll. Knocking over their next four opponents in impressive fashion, they look to be one of the main opposers to the Vikings in the NFC. If this squad stays healthy, expect them to turn some heads en-route to a top seed in the playoffs. Welcome Atlanta to the Top 5 for the first time this year!
Denver Broncos 4-1Yeah, yeah I know. They lost. You should know by now that wins and losses don’t dictate where I place my teams (see how long it took me to take Carolina out of the Top 5). The fact is, the Broncos lost to a good team while their starting quarterback and right tackle were out. Heads up to John Elway, you draft great but, Michael Schofield is NOT a pro lineman. The following things come to mind while watching him attempt to block NFL pass rushers: Cottonelle, pillow-top mattresses, marshmallows, those Modal underwear that ESPN keeps advertising. You know Schofield as the turnstile that Khalil Mack had to pass through to get the five sacks he racked up in Denver last year. Either way, I expect the Broncos to bounce back on Thursday night with Trevor Siemian expected back in the lineup against the Chargers.
Miami Dolphins 1-4I think the time has come to move on from calling Ryan Tannehill a, “young guy with potential.” It’s safe to say that he is a physically talented guy that doesn’t seem to have the pocket awareness or decision making skills needed to succeed in the NFL. All that we can hope for is that the Dolphin’s brass knows they have a solid guy in Adam Gase, and take the necessary steps to help him succeed.
Chicago Bears 1-4Admittedly, they have looked better with Hoyer under center than Cutler. However, that’s like saying the last time I threw up was slightly less traumatic than the time before that. Either way, you’re in a terrible place and you stink. Bright spots on this team continue to be the talent of their receivers and newly discovered running back, Jordan Howard. Still not enough to move out of the Bottom 5.
New York Jets 1-4Ryan Fitzpatrick is somewhat a hero of mine. We should all be so lucky to get paid millions of dollars to be terrible at what we do. Unfortunately, we’re not NFL quarterbacks or Fortune 500 CEO’s. The Jets have always been that laughing stock of the NFL that still had a solid defense. Now, outside of their defensive line, there is really nothing to be impressed with. Forte is starting to look more and more over the hill, and Brandon Marshall can only do so much.
San Francisco 49ers 1-4Right back where they started in week one. Chip Kelly and his coaching staff have some soul searching to do about who is leading their team. Blaine Gabbert showed us what he really was through his tenure in Jacksonville. Nothing has changed since then. He’s a powerful arm that can’t hit the open receiver and isn’t supremely athletic. At some point, his royal afro-ness needs to get his shot under center. At least he’s proven he can succeed with a strong running game and stout defense.
Cleveland Browns 0-5Is it too early to start working on next season? Browns ownership and management must have known this is a two to three year process when hiring Hue Jackson. This is the definition of polishing a turd. I don’t think even Hoodie himself could muster more than two or three wins out of this squad. Let’s hope for Hue’s sake, things turn around in Cleveland.
Written By: Eddie Cepeda – Follow Eddie on Twitter: @eddiecee23
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